Today while flying from Dallas to Chicago I did something reckless and potentially life-threatening: I turned on my cell phone. It seems foolhardy and reckless in retrospect, but I was curious to see what would happen. I was in the lavatory and I turned on my cell phone, and started to play a game of solitaire. I figured that if the airplane started to stall or nosedive I would probably feel something, and then I could turn the phone off or take the battery out quickly. Or if the cellphone blew up it should be safely contained to the lavatory.
Well, to make a long story short, nothing happened. I finished my game of solitaire (didn’t win) and made my way back to my seat, disillusioned, to find everything the way I left it (aside from a few angry people at the back who had been waiting a while). And now I have to assume that either our leadership is incompetent or I’ve been mislead. And what CAN I believe? Can I talk on my phone while in flight at no risk? What would happen if I were to bring more than 1 quart of liquid onboard? I always assumed it would explode, but now I wonder if maybe 1.1 or even 1.2 quarts would be perfectly safe?? Come to think of it, my body is 70% water… at 200 pounds of bodyweight that means I’m carrying over 140 pounds of liquid with me at any given time! If I assume I can carry another 6 or 7 ounces in my bladder, and another 4 ounces in my mouth, that makes almost 141 pounds of liquid I can carry with me thru security! Is this dangerous??? What if some nefarious person were to drain some of their bodily fluids and replace it with something dangerous… perhaps we should require a blood transfusion at security checkpoints, just to be safe.
(By the way Paige, I know you were on the same flight, sorry about putting your life at risk and all…)








